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The World's Funniest Dinosaur Jokes

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The World's Funniest Dinosaur Jokes

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Q: Why do museums have old dinosaur bones?
A: Because they can't afford new ones!

Q: What did Triceratops sit on?
A: Its Tricera-bottom!

Q: What’s the best way to talk to a Velociraptor?
A: Long distance!

Q: Why did the T. Rex cross the road?
A1: Because chickens hadn't evolved yet!
A2: Because it was chasing a chicken.
A3: Because it was being chased by a chicken.
A4: Because it thought it was a chicken.

Q: How do you ask a tyrannosaur out to lunch?
A: "Tea, Rex?"

Q. What was 30 feet long, had a two-foot-long beak, and left crumbs all over the mattress?
A. Pretzelcoatlus!

Q: What do you call a blind Majungatholus?
A: Doyathinkhesaurus?

Q. What do you call a blind Majungatholus' dog?
A. Doyouthinkhesaurus Rex.

Q: What’s better than a talking Vulcanodon?
A. A spelling bee!

Person 1: I keep seeing Pteranodons with orange polka dots.
Person 2: Have you seen an eye doctor yet?
Person 1: No, just Pteranodons with orange polka dots.

Q: How can you tell there's an Allosaurus in your bed?
A: By the bright red "A" on its pajamas.

Q: How can you tell there's a Stegosaurus in your refrigerator?
A: The door won't close!

Q: What family does Shantungosaurus belong to?
A. I don't know. I don't think any family in our neighborhood owns one!

Child 1: Hey, who stepped on your foot?
Child 2: Well, did you see that Gorgosaurus over there?
Child 1: Yes.
Child 2: Well, I didn't!

Q: What has a prominent head crest, a duck-like bill, and sixteen wheels?
A: A Maiasaura on roller skates!

Q: Why did carnivorous dinosaurs eat raw meat?
A: Because they didn't know how to barbecue!

Q. How did the dinosaur stay dry in the rain?
A. He used a Parasololophus!

Q: What has sharp fangs and sticks to the roof of your mouth?
A. A peanut butter and Jeholopterus sandwich.

Q. What do you call a terrible, horrible, unpleasant dinosaur?
A. A Thesaurus.

Q. Why did the Bambiraptor say "knock-knock?"
A. Because it was in the wrong joke.

Q: Why don't dinosaurs ever forget?
A: Because they never knew anything in the first place!

Q. What happened when the Brachiosaurus took the train home?
A. He had to bring it back!

Child 1: I lost my pet Iguanodon!
Child 2: Why don't you put an ad in the paper?
Child 1: What good would that do? He can't read!

Q: What's purple and green and won't stop singing?
A. Barney taking a shower!

Q. What do you say to a 10-ton Albertosaurus wearing earphones?
A. Whatever you want. He can't hear you!

Q. What did dinosaurs use to make their hot dogs?
A. Jurassic pork!

Q. What dinosaur could jump higher than a house?
A. All of them. Houses can't jump!

Q. What should you do if you find a blue Dilophosaurus?
A. Try to cheer him up!

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